As I do every year, it's that time to reflect on the year that's been, and talk about some of my hopes and goals for the next year! I'll be honest, this one is harder to write than last year's. It was an emotionally intense year in a lot of ways. Here's to a good 2026!

Reflecting on 2025

Where last year I got sick and had time black holes from that, this year I lost time to various planned surgeries. I didn't get nearly as much done, because it was also hard to stay focused with all the attacks on trans rights happening. Without further ado, what'd I get up to?

Professional

I helped coaching clients land jobs and improve their lives at work and beyond. I started coaching informally in 2024, and in 2025 I took on some clients formally. During the year, I helped clients improve their skills, build their confidence, and land great new jobs. I also helped clients learn how to balance their work and home life, how to be more productive and focused, and how to navigate a changing industry. This was one of the most rewarding things I did all year. I hope to do more of it this coming year! If you want to explore working together, email me or schedule an intro.

I solved interesting problems at work. This reflection is mostly private, because it's so intertwined with work that's confidential. I learned a lot, and also got to see team members blossom into their own leadership roles. It is really fun watching people grow over time.

I took on some consulting work. I had some small engagements to consult with clients, and those were really fun. Most of the work was focused on performance-sensitive web apps and networked code, using (naturally) Rust. This is something I'll be expanding this year! I've left my day job and am spinning up my consulting business again. More on that soon, but for now, email me if you want help with software engineering (especially web app performance) or need a principal engineer to step in and provide some engineering leadership.

I wrote some good blog posts. This year, my writing output dropped to about 1/3 of what it was last year. Despite the reduction, I wrote some pretty good posts that I'm really happy with! I took a break intentionally to spend some time dealing with everything going on around me, and that helped a lot. I didn't get back to consistent weekly posts, but I intend to in 2026.

Personal

My hernias were fixed. During previous medical adventures, some hernias were found. I go those fixed^[1]! Recovering from hernia repair isn't fun, but wasn't too bad in the long run. It resolved some pain I'd had for a while, which I hadn't realized was unusual pain. (Story of my life, honestly.)

Long-awaited surgery! In addition to the hernia repair, I had another planned surgery done. The recovery was long, and is still ongoing. My medical leave was 12 weeks, and I'm going to continue recovering for about the first year in various forms. This has brought me so much deep relief, I can't even put it in words.

Performed a 30-minute set at West Philly Porchfest. I did a solo set in West Philly Porchfest! All the arrangements were done by me, and I performed all the parts live (well, one part used a pre-sequenced arpeggiator). I played my wind synth as my main instrument, layering parts over top of myself with a looper, and I also played the drum parts. You can watch a few of the pieces in a YouTube playlist.

Wrote and recorded two pieces of original music. This was one of my goals from 2024, and I'm very proud that I got it done. The first piece of music, Anticipation, came from an exercise a music therapist had me do. I took the little vignette and expanded it into a full piece, but more importantly, the exercise gave me an approach to composition. I'd like to rerecord Anticipation sometime, since I've grown as a musician significantly across the year.

My second piece I'm even happier with. It's called Little Joys, and I'm just tickled that I was able to write this. I played it on my alto sax (piped through a pedal board) and programmed the other parts using a sequencer.

One of my poems was published! I've written a lot more poetry this year. One of my close friends told me that I should get one of them published to have more people read it. They thought it was a good and important poem. That gave me the confidence to submit some poems, and one of them was accepted! (The one they told me to submit was not yet accepted anywhere, but fingers crossed.) You can read my poem, "my voice", in the December issue of Lavender Review.

Last year's goals

Every year when I write this, I realize I got a lot done. This year was a lot, filled with way more creative output than previous years. How does it stack up against what I wanted to do last year?

• ❓ Once again, I wanted to keep my rights. It's a perennial goal, and I did keep my rights in the state/community I live in. I'm awarding this one a question mark since my rights were under assault, and there are now many more places I cannot safely travel to. That means it's not a full miss, but not a win either.
• ✅ No personal-time side projects went into production! Yet another year that I toyed with the idea and again talked myself out of it. I'm taking it off the list for 2026, since the urge wasn't really even there this time.
• ✅ Maintained relationships with friends and family. I've had regular, scheduled calls with some people close to me. I've visited people, supported them when they needed me, and asked for support when I needed it.
• ❓ I did a little consulting and coaching, but didn't explore many ways to make this (playful exploration like I do on here) my living. I'm giving this the question mark of dubiousity, since I don't think I got much information from the year toward the questions I wanted to answer.
• ✅ Kept my mental health strong! There were certainly some challenges. What I'm proud of most is that I recognized those challenges and made space for myself. That's why I stopped blogging regularly: I needed the space to get through things with intact mental health.
• ❓ Did some ridiculous fun projects with code, but not as much as I wanted. The main project was making it so I can type using my keyboard (you know, like a piano, not the thing with letters on it). I had aspired to do more, and I'm glad I let myself relax on this.
• ✅ Wrote some original music!
• ✅ Also recorded that original music! It's on my bandcamp page.

I am really proud of how much I did on my goals. I might be unhappy with my slipping on if it were a "normal" year where the government isn't trying to strip my rights, but you know what? I'll take it. Especially since I prioritized my health and happiness.

Hopes and goals for 2026

So, what would I like to get out of this new year, 2026? These aren't my predictions for what will happen, nor are they concrete goals. They're more of a reflection on what I'd like this coming year to be. This is what I'm dreaming 2026 will be like for me.

Keep my rights (and maybe regain ground). A perennial goal, I'd like to be able to stay where I am and have access to, I don't know, doctors and bathrooms. We've held a lot of ground this year. Hopefully some of what was lost can be regained. I'm going to keep doing what I can, and that includes living my best life and being positive representation for all others who are under attack.

Maintain relationships with friends and family. I want to keep up with my friends and family and continue having regular chats with those I care about. We're a social species, and we rely on each other for support. I'm going to keep being there for the people I care about when they need me, and keep accepting their help as well when I need them.

Spin up my business. I'm going out on my own, and I'm going to be offering my software engineering services again. By the end of the year, this will hopefully be thrumming along to support me and my family.

Publish weekly blog posts (sustainably). I'm back in the saddle! This is the first post of 2026, and they're going to hopefully keep coming regularly. To make it sustainable, I'm going to explore if Patreon is a viable option to offset some of the time it takes to make the blog worth reading.

Record a short album. I have a track in progress, and I have four more track ideas planned. I accidentally started writing an EP, I think??? This year I would love to actually finish that and release it.

Publish more poetry. Writing poetry this year was very meaningful, and it's deeply important to me. I want to get more of it published so that I can share it with people who will also be able to get deep importance from it.

That's it! Wow, the year was a lot. I've put a lot of myself in this post. If you've read this far, thank you so much for reading. If you've not read this far, then how're you reading this sentence anyway?

2025 had a lot in it. There were some very good things I am very grateful for. There were some very scary and bad things that I wish had never happened. All told, it's been a long few years jammed into one calendar year.

I hope that 2026 will be a little calmer, with less of the bad. Maybe it can feel like just one year. Regardless, I'm going to hold as much joy in the world this year as I can.

Please join me in that. Let's fill 2026 with as much joy as we can, and make the world shine in spite of everything.

1. The surgeon really meshed me up! ↩